in fourteen hundred ninety two
Columbus sailed the ocean, true
he continued his adventure, he never knew
when he landed, he hadn’t a clue

to find new land
to search the sea
to give his history
to you and me

he sought new homes
and skies of blue
for the ancestors
of me and you

there’s only one thing
that he didn’t know
is what he had lurking
hidden, in stow

the journey started
without a hitch
like all sailing ships, they
started to pitch

no one was worried
this was minor, even then
it was the unknown part
they were in the lion’s den

the cruise continued
it was going pretty well
but this is the story
that no one would tell

diminished, one by one
the crew, they all fell
in the bilge, they had stowed
it was a beast, from Hell

slowly, one by one
the crew all turned blue
they all ran a fever
having symptoms of flu

it was only one a day
eventually, they’d all die
I was there, I remember
it’s true now, it’s no lie

we didn’t have a doctor
they thought it was the plague
there were even the learned
they all seemed so vague

it was strange because Atheist
prayed to the Lord
no one had any idea
what had been brought on board

the men only suffered
for just a day or so
then, over the side
their bodies would go

into the darkness
the black, murky sea
I witnessed it all
I tell you for free

over the many weeks
the crew all grew thin
everyone started thinking
that Satan would win

we all went to quarters
it was to bed, at first light
we sailed by the stars
roaming the seas, by night

one day, we were aware
all the groceries ran out
it’s certainly not the kind
that you’re thinking about

it’s not the kind of food
that’s normally seen
it’s groceries for ghouls
like on the movie screen

it was within a week
we all were so pleased
“land-ho” was sounded
and dinner was seized

everyone was filled from
the bloody, macabre feast
Thanksgiving was upon us
giving thanks to the Beast

the ships were all loaded
to the sails with fresh meat
and to each of the survivors
it was certainly a treat

I let them all go now
to them it was good-bye
I had new hunting grounds
it was time for them to die

one by one, I staked them
right through the heart
poor Columbus went home
he had to re-start

history doesn’t mention
any of these facts
it’s because me and Columbus
had made up a pact

for many years, I wandered
throughout the countryside
roaming for decades
for places to hide

I settled down south
somewhere in Mexico
I started a religion
defunct, as you know

the Aztecs worshiped me
they all took me in
they thought I was a God
that could abolish all sin

I killed them all off
I guided their way
as you know, I’m still living
I’m among you today

there are people out there
they refer to us as “Ghouls”
I think that they’re jealous
they haven’t our “tools”

we all hunt at night
and rest during the day
you’d better beware
and learn how to pray

we’re very close to you
we live all around
you could almost bet that
we’re in your home town

you might have even seen us
out of the corner of your eye
beware, here’s your warning
it’s the truth, I don’t lie

you might see us lurking
outside your favorite store
there are others, you’ll see
that are a troublesome bore

there are others, overlooked
it’s the neighborhood whore
this is fact, not fiction
we are not, just lore

we might live in junks
or hide in some heaps
we might dress as Goths
or gang member creeps

I’m telling you this
just so you’ll know
all ways be careful
where ever you go

I’ve been here for centuries
over five hundred years
I’m sure that I’ve drawn
over a billion tears

time is irrelevant
I’m not in a hurry
I’m only writing this
to cause you to worry

as my hunger increases
it’s time for me to go
it’s your blood, I seek
as you probably know

if I ever meet you
while you’re out on the street
you might be my dinner
and become my next treat

if you haven’t guessed it
or haven’t figured it out
before you start to holler and
begin to scream and shout

I’m a very old Vampire
it’s the truth, now you know
I could turn you or kill you
and to the darkness, you’ll go

now you know some history
from the textbooks of the dead
it’s something you can think about
the next time you’re in bed

it won’t be taught in college
you can’t learn it at school
the only way to truly learn
is being turned, into a ghoul